On Civility in Children - Desiderius Erasmus

Summary

'De civilitate morum puerilium' (On the Civility of Children's Manners) by Desiderius Erasmus, published in 1530, is a highly influential didactic treatise aimed at instructing young boys on proper behavior and etiquette. Commissioned for Prince Henry of Burgundy, the book provides a comprehensive guide to developing good manners, encompassing bodily posture, facial expressions, speech, table etiquette, dress, personal hygiene, and interactions with others. It emphasizes that outward decorum is a reflection of inner virtue and discipline, and that cultivating civility from a young age is crucial for social harmony, personal development, and becoming a respected member of society. The book meticulously details how a child should present himself in various situations, aiming to instill habits that would lead to a graceful and virtuous life.

Book Sections

Section 1: General Conduct and Bodily Posture

Erasmus begins by addressing the fundamental importance of a well-composed body. He advises against fidgeting, slouching, scratching, and other unseemly physical habits. The text instructs on how to walk, stand, and sit properly, advocating for a dignified and controlled physical presence. It stresses that the eyes should be modest, the hands calm, and the face free from unnecessary contortions. The underlying principle is that a disciplined body reflects a disciplined mind and respect for one's surroundings and company.

Character	Characteristics	Motivations
The Child	Young, impressionable, learning, recipient of advice.	To learn proper social behavior, gain respect, avoid shame, become a well-adjusted individual.
The Educator	Adult, authoritative, wise, implicitly Erasmus or the parent/tutor.	To guide the child, instill virtue, ensure social harmony, uphold societal standards of decorum.

Section 2: Facial Expressions and Gestures

This section delves into the specifics of facial expressions and hand movements. Erasmus counsels against exaggerated smiles, scowling, or constant frowning, recommending a pleasant yet modest countenance. For hands, he warns against nail-biting, nose-picking, or restless fidgeting, instead advocating for controlled and purposeful gestures. He highlights that the face and hands are primary points of observation, and thus their movements should convey self-control and civility.

Section 3: Speech and Conversation

Erasmus provides detailed instructions on the art of proper speech and conversation. He advises speaking clearly, moderately, and avoiding shouting, mumbling, or interrupting others. The text warns against excessive talking, gossiping, boasting, or lying. It encourages respectful address, using appropriate honorifics, and listening attentively when others speak. Truthfulness, modesty, and respectful communication are presented as essential virtues.

Section 4: Table Manners

This is one of the most comprehensive sections, offering extensive advice on dining etiquette. Erasmus covers the necessity of washing hands before eating, sitting upright, not rushing or snatching food, chewing with the mouth closed, and refraining from talking with food in the mouth. He also advises against reaching across the table, picking teeth, spitting, or making loud noises while eating. Modest consumption and polite interaction during meals are emphasized to ensure a pleasant dining experience for all.

Section 5: Dress and Personal Appearance

The importance of neatness and modesty in dress is the focus here. Erasmus instructs that clothes should be clean, well-maintained, and appropriate for one's station, avoiding both slovenliness and ostentation. Hair should be combed, and general personal hygiene maintained. The appearance should outwardly reflect an organized mind and a respectful attitude towards oneself and others.

Section 6: Behavior in Public and Private Spaces

This section extends the code of conduct to various settings. It outlines appropriate behavior in public spaces such as church (reverence and quiet), school (attentiveness and respect for teachers), and general public (politeness and awareness). It also addresses private matters, advocating for discretion and privacy in bodily functions, and warning against crude or vulgar behaviors.

Section 7: Relationships with Others and Moral Virtues

Finally, Erasmus broadens his advice to encompass social interactions and moral virtues. He stresses humility, generosity, compassion, and respect for elders and superiors. He cautions against rudeness, bullying, or arrogance and encourages offering help, showing gratitude, and avoiding unnecessary disputes. The overarching goal is to foster kindness, justice, and harmonious social relations through individual virtuous conduct.

Literary Genre

Didactic treatise, etiquette guide, conduct book, pedagogical work.

Author Facts

• Name: Desiderius Erasmus Roterodamus.
• Born: October 28, 1466 (or 1469), Rotterdam, Holland, Holy Roman Empire.
• Died: July 12, 1536, Basel, Switzerland.
• Occupation: Dutch humanist, Catholic priest, social critic, teacher, and theologian.
• Key Works: Adagia, Encomium Moriae (Praise of Folly), Colloquia, and his new Latin and Greek editions of the New Testament.
• Influence: A pivotal figure of the Northern Renaissance, Erasmus championed classical learning and a return to the pristine texts of early Christianity. He advocated for internal reform within the Catholic Church and significantly influenced religious and intellectual thought across Europe.

Morale

The core moral of 'De civilitate morum puerilium' is that external civility and good manners are not superficial acts but fundamental expressions of internal virtue, self-control, and respect for oneself and others. By diligently cultivating decorum from a young age, children develop character, foster harmonious social interactions, and contribute to a well-ordered and respectful society. Good manners are presented as an indispensable pathway to virtue and a necessary foundation for a fulfilling, respected, and socially integrated life.

Curiosities

• Pioneering Work: This book is widely regarded as one of the earliest and most influential courtesy books specifically for children in European history, setting a standard for countless similar works that followed.
• Royal Commission: It was originally written at the request of Erasmus's friend, Franciscus Dilfus, for his nephew, the 11-year-old Prince Henry of Burgundy, son of Adolphe of Burgundy, lord of Veere.
• Widespread Adoption: Despite its specific initial audience, the book quickly became immensely popular across Europe and was widely adopted as a standard textbook in schools for centuries, shaping the manners of generations.
• Multilingual Reach: Written in Latin, the lingua franca of scholars, it was swiftly translated into numerous vernacular languages, testifying to its broad appeal and practical utility across different cultures and social strata.
• Impact on Social Norms: Erasmus's work profoundly influenced the development of European social etiquette. Many of the basic manners and social conventions we practice today, particularly concerning table manners and public comportment, can trace their origins or reinforcement back to such detailed guides.
• Humanist Ideal: The treatise perfectly embodies the humanist ideal of paideia—the holistic education of an individual to become a virtuous, well-rounded, and effective member of society, encompassing moral, intellectual, and physical development.